I think about my one friend in high school, who was not technically allowed to read anything that her parents didn’t approve of. There was a special exception for things required by school, but they’d go over those at home and “correct” any bad information.
She checked out 2 books a day from the school library and read voraciously on her own and returning the books to the library at the end of the day. She’d get done work early or just skip any work time in class to read her books.
Her parents were ‘old-fashioned’ too. They didn’t think their child should be reading anything they didn’t personally approve of first.
There was a reason she never told her parents she checked out books from the school library. There was a reason none of the teachers scolded her for reading or told her parents about it during parent-teacher conferences.
They were actively preventing further abuse of a vulnerable teenager under their care.
I seem to be thinking a lot of her lately with everything, everything that is happening.
When I was a school librarian I knew a lot of kids who had a list of “acceptable” books or topics. Most did stick to their list even when they were miserable about it. Some out of fear of their parents reaction, many out of a desire for their parent to approve of them.
A few things came of those lists:
- their reading got stunted because they couldn’t follow their interests and got bored
- they experienced social problems not being able to keep up with the popular series their friends all wanted to talk about
- they got really sad. Kids know when they’re missing out. It’s hard to see your friends all getting to do something you’re cut off from.
But the amount of times I had kids coming to me with lists and asking me to help them find books on the edges of acceptable or that they could sneak past the censor (parent). Are there books that look like they’re about THIS topic but are actually about THAT? What’s a horror book that doesn’t LOOK like a horror book?
A lot of parents cultivate dishonestly in their kids. They teach their kids— often inadvertently!— that they can’t be trusted with the full truth. Their approval is conditional. Their anger is frightening.
Maybe when it came down to it, the parent would be fine. They’d react differently than expected. They’d decide this situation requires a more nuanced take.
But their kids don’t know that. And that’s a hell of a risk to take. Especially with the being that controls your whole life.
And if you’re asking, “why would adults help my child lie to me?” It’s because we don’t trust you either. Your child’s safety is our top priority. We’re not about to risk that, even from you. Being in your child’s corner sometimes means not being in yours.
im just laying down but NOT for a nap guys i swear im getting comfy cozy but im NOT GOING TO FALL ASLEEP my ass is NOT laying my head to rest bro im just getting snug as a bug in a rug. FOR NO REASON. ill be awake the whole time bro i swear. me and my stuffed animals are just hanging out dude i PROMISE ill be awake im not sle
An Ohio elementary school decided to hold its first-ever “Ice Cream Friday” last week.
But there was one rule: No ice cream for students with outstanding school lunch debt.
Outrage ensued. A local restaurant owner decided to pay off the school debt, which was about $400.
What the actual fuck. Why does anyone think that punishing kids for having poor parents is okay? Why does anyone think that punishing poor people for being poor is okay?
